I’m writing from the “cave” right now. The cave is what my roommate and I refer to my room as when I close my curtains, shut the door, and turn off all of the lights. It becomes as dark as a cave. I only resort to the cave on the bad days or when I really need a nap. Today was one of those days. It wasn’t a bad day, it was more of an “off” day. I couldn’t seem to get myself together. I slept terribly last night. I developed a headache today. And so the cave appeared when I got home.
As I got up I finally went over and opened my curtain and was delighted to see that the sun had mostly set and that the sky was a deep blue full of wispy willowed clouds. It’s beautiful. While daylight savings makes the days seem shorter I do like it on days like today when I’m just ready for it to be night.
Somedays I just want it to be night. I just want a redo. Headache days are often like this. But in the midst of my agony and despair there is light – the stars. Stars have always fascinated me. As a child I would get excited to be outside on breezy summer night so that I could watch the stars. My best friend and I love to watch the stars at the beach. Last Memorial Day when we were there we walked out there one night and the sky was breathtaking. I could have lied in the sand all night long.
When I was in India God really used the stars to touch my heart. We were in a city that was not as populated as where our main ministry was. We were staying at a family’s house that had a large roof/balcony. Roofs are big deal in India. This is where people do their laundry, sleep on really hot nights, and fly kites from. We spent some wonderful nights out on this particular roof.
This city was full of despair. It was highly influenced by Islam. You could hear the prayer calls every night blaring from the mosque. There was a heaviness surrounding the city that we could all feel and knew what it was. Yet even in the dark, there was light. The view of the stars from this city was incredible! We would have worship on the roof where some people would play the guitar or we would listen to music through our little speakers. I remember just lying on my back on the hard concrete gazing at the stars above me thinking that the God who created those stars loved me and cared for me. It was all too much for my small and feeble heart to manage. And yet it rocked my world.
So on these “cave” days I will not despair. I will look for the stars, those small glimmers of hope. Because ultimately they reflect the glory of God in a mighty and powerful way.